Musto: Paris Is A Full-Blown Dyke, Hilton Theme Park Coming

The Zulkey.com blog corrals Village Voice gossip eminence/ubiquitous VH1 talking head Michael Musto for a few questions, and Musto reveals his forecast for the coming Year in Paris:
Speaking of which, is Paris Hilton bi, in your opinion, or does she just like making out with chicks for the attention?
I don't think she's bi, I think she's a full-fledged dyke.
Look into your crystal ball: what kind of year do you think Paris Poo will have in the '05?
With her parents both getting reality shows as well, I believe the TV set will explode and the Hilton clan will be lodged in parts of all of our apartments. They will then be reassembled into a theme park in Orlando.
When can we buy tickets? We're thinking the Hiltons are savvy enough to erect a knockoff of Disney World before the entire family's popularity flames out. The "It's a Small World in Paris' Vagina" ride is going to have some incredible wait times, but will be worth it for a slow boat tour through her genitalia while catchy music narrates her sexual escapades.