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Wherein we invite our readers to untangle the slippery prose-spaghetti of humpy E! gossipist Ted Casablanca and guess the identity of his weekly blind item. Today, Ted puts the butt-sex of supposedly straight actors on the back burner and foregrounds our other favorite blind item topic, drug abuse. Ecce, One Blind Blind Vice:

Ted sez: "Fine, there has been too much homo stuff these past weeks. I've gotta give just a tad to the hetero high rollers, right? And in the case of Velma Verge, high is the appropriate word, damn straight. t's an old story: A young, pretty girl gets—in no particular order—fame, a fellah and overfed." Read the item.

You say: Send your guesses to tips@defamer.com. We'll post them later today.

UPDATE: Your guesses are in!