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Wherein we invite you, the inquisitive reader, to divine the identity of the weekly blind item from humpy E! gossip cryptographer Ted Casablanca. We're confident that One Busty Blind Vice's lack of hetero-posing actors or wild drug abuse won't keep you from your appointed gossip-guessing rounds:

Ted sez: "Shy Sylvester has 'em fooled. Mr. S., so silly, so sweet, so supertalented, has been on quite the rise as of late. His boob-tube series, Janitorial Geniuses, is a megahit. And then if that weren't enough to make the against-the-grain dude infinitely more dork-desirable, he goes and stars in a surprise box-office success. Damn, he's got it made!"Read the full item.

You say: Send guesses to tips@defamer.com. Your responses posted later in the day.

BONUS BLIND ITEM, JUST FOR FUN: From today's Rush & Molloy: "What high-powered agent is hitting the boy bars with a vengeance now that he's split from his wife? 'I conquered Hollywood,' he boasted to friends the other night. 'Now I'll conquer West Hollywood!' ..."

UPDATE: Your guesses.