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Page Six has a touching item about how Dustin Hoffman played matchmaker and made a love connection for sweethearts Jason Schwartzman and Zooey Deschanel (who once unknowingly spent an enchanted evening serenading us in one of Hollywood's most dive-tastic karaoke bars). But the momentary fuzzy feeling that spread across our blackened hearts was quickly replaced by horror, as we realized that the couple must immediately surrender fifteen cred points for being labeled as "Hollywood hipsters" by the gossip establishment. How mortifying. They'll be lucky to avoid being stoned to death by the hipsterati the next time they try to sneak into Spaceland to catch a show.