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It's easy to write off Nicky as the Boring/Sedated/Semi-sane Hilton Sister, but we've developed a theory that her yawn-inducing, relatively tabloid-free existence has just been a string of bad luck. We're becoming more and more certain that a coin flip determines which sister takes the Greyhound to Skanktown while the other stays home at the mansion to abuse the servants in obscurity. Nicky's been on a prolonged unlucky streak and had to dye her hair brunette, lost a spot on The Simple Life, and missed out on amateur porn stardom. We're unsure of the result of this weekend's Vegas coin toss, where Nicky inexplicably married her 33-year-old money manager boyfriend at the 'Lil White Chapel O' Drunken Regrets, while Paris and Tara Reid pounded tequila shots and danced like white girls with their hair on fire at Ghost Bar. We think she lost, but that's pending a review of Paris and Tara's next gyno exam or the release of a "honeymoon" sex tape.