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Tinfoil-helmeted blogger Jim Treacher has a moment of clarity, where the sex scandals align and conspiracies are nearly revealed. Jack Ryan's public sex scandal...a former "Jack Ryan" allegedly f**ked in the a**? Something is up:

I guess I'm a little late to the party on this, but has anybody else noticed the connection? Jack Ryan? Sex scandal! Guy who once played a character named "Jack Ryan"? Sex scandal!

Coincidence? I might have thought so before I saw F9/11, but now I'm a lot smarter than that. It's obviously a plot to discredit both the left and the right at the same time by pointing out what they and their loved ones/new friends/hired help do with their potty-parts. And do you know who would have the most to gain from such tactics?

We'd normally be waiting for the other shoe to drop on the first "Jack Ryan," but the idea of a Harrison Ford/Calista Flockhart sex scandal (picture your grandfather trying to copulate with a broomstick) is just too unpleasant to consider. And the only public fucking that Jack Ryan Number Three does these days is to his career.