I know you've all paid careful attention to the 18 episodes of Dave Eggers' serialized novel on Salon. If anyone wanted to hide a map of Iraq's weapons of mass destruction or pictures of Tom Cruise having sex with children in Malaysian sweatshops, inside Eggers' book would be the place to do it.

Thanks to Low Culture and Microsoft Word's "autosummarize" feature, you too can read the whole shebang in about twenty seconds. Very little context or plot is lost in the translation:

"Bastards!" said Sergei.

Sergei said, as it took shape. Poor Little Nicky. Nicky whistled.

Sergei and Nicky had no blimp. "Fucking internet," Sergei muttered. Sergei turned to Nicky. "See if there's another blimp."

Hard Boiled Eggers [Low Culture]
The Unforbidden Is Compulsory Or, Optimism [Salon]