This image was lost some time after publication, but you can still view it here.

It's a little late in the day, but what the hell, let's play the Guess Ted C's Blind Item Game! We invite our readers to decode E!'s humpy gossiper's gobbledygook and take a stab at uncovering his secret gossip item. This week's Unbedded Blind Vice:

Ted sez: There's a hoochie-coochie for hire who's rather famous—or make that infamous. Let's call her Zoom Zuma, why don't we? Mais oui! Z2 has bedded just about everybody round T-town, save an odd housekeeper, doorman, studio exec or wine steward. But her most brilliant conquest thus far—ironically enough—is with a man she never exactly slept with.

You see, there has been mucho gabbing about a certain sexy Tinseltown twosome supposedly hitting a bit o' a rough spot. (What twosome doesn't in this heartless enclave?) And faster than you can say, "My last movie was a bomb!" Ms. Z. smelled tabloid paydirt beyond compare and zoomed her curvaceous bod in for the other-womanly kill. It worked—for a kissy-kissy bit. But it hardly got to the point requiring the two R's: rubbers and regret. Certainly, this was not a typical (or satisfactory) sitch for the double-Z. How can she take it, you gonzo gossips ask?

Make me laugh!

How can this gal's next bedroom mark take it, is more like it.

(To be fair, I have only a small amount of sympathy for these poor dudes—you guys should try this badass behavior on for size, and see how it feels!)

You say: Send guesses to tips@defamer.com. If there aren't enough guesses, we'll hold over your answers until tomorrow.