In a blow to eternally adolescent men everywhere, David Letterman broke down and got hitched.

Private things you'll discuss publicly today: a ratlike fashion editor, a cokey former tabloid editor, a star's cheating husband, a gay TV icon who likes pee, and an OCD celeb:

Diablo Cody and her Hollywood gal-pals cooperated on today's self-consciously sexy New York Times profile. Odd, then, that they complained people pay too much attention to their looks.

Sean Penn is in bed with the ayatollahs, as everyone, but especially the New York Post, knows. He loves evil Iranians so much that he had himself cut from a movie which depicted them negatively.

From the Mixed Up Twitter Files of Ashton E. Kutcher. Yesterday our Tweetingest celebrity posted a revealing photo of his wife, actress Demi Moore, bending over in a bikini while steaming something. How risque!

Today we have actors who like doing sex with people. One actor doesn't mind if you're married, two others would like you to be porn stars. Also, a House death and something about perfume.

Giving geeks everywhere hope, Jim Clark, cofounder of Silicon Graphics and Netscape, is marrying swimsuit model Kristy Hinze this weekend on Richard Branson's Necker Island — also the site of Google founder Larry Page's nuptials.

While everyone was watching Barack Obama on Leno last night, that increasingly-prickish-seeming McLovin' kid, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, was on Jimmy Kimmel's not-actually-live show last night saying "fuckin'" and not getting bleeped. Not that anyone noticed.

[Victoria Beckham on her way to meet Katie Holmes for dinner at Nobu; image via INF]

A kiddie update gets a release date, lawsuits are filed, quirky indies are cast with cult fave actors, Michael from The Wire joins the war effort, and people are watching Gary Unmarried.

After the former Project Runway contestant was arrested for assaulting her ex-bf with a cat, Collins has said that the fella, Zak Penley, will have full custody of the poor creature:

Today we have a marriage of convenience, credit stealing hip hoppers, a young couple having public sex, a washed-up actor with a fetish, and a frustrated reality star.

In an otherwise agreeable appearance on the Tonight Show, the president compared his bowling to "like Special Olympics, or something." This is why presidents avoid late-night TV.

Actor Liam Neeson understandably set aside his work in Chloe, which was shooting in Toronto when Neeson's wife Natasha Richardson suffered a fatal skiing accident. His next role?

Well, that was unexpected. On last night's Idol elimination episode, twasn't Scott (as I predicted) or Anoop (as some of you did). It was blondie Alexis who went home. Wha' happened?

What can one say about this particular episode of The Real World: Brooklyn, this pop-music-scored, messy smear of patriotism and war protest and voting frenzy? Not much, really. But let's try anyway.

A SAG-sack returns, two beauties team up for impossibly beautiful lovemaking, Up graces Cannes, Kevin Costner is back, and so is Behind the Music.

Today we have a football player who can drank, a skeezy casting couch situation, an STD-riddled TV actor, and a PA fed up with covering for his cheating boss.

Following Natasha Richardson's death at age 45, we take a look back at the actress' career.

Actress Natasha Richardson passed away in a New York hospital following complications from the brain injury she incurred while skiing, according to a statement released by her family. She was 45.